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Title: I Don't Have to Make Everything All Better: Six Practical Principles That Empower Others to Solve Their Own Problems While Enriching Your Relationships by Gary Lundberg, Joy Lundberg ISBN: 0-14-028643-8 Publisher: Penguin Books Pub. Date: 01 May, 2000 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.75 (16 reviews)
Rating: 5
Summary: The Best Relationship Book I've Ever Read!
Comment: I Don't Have To Make Everything All Better, the title caught my eye as I browsed through an airport bookstore. The first thought that came to my mind was, "I wish that were true." At the time I was heavy with personal and relationship issues and the title made me curious so I bought the book. As I read this book over the next couple of days issues in my relationships became amazingly clear. I kept thinking, "Yes, yes, this is it! This is what I need to be applying in my marriage and in all my relationships!" Each page seemed incredibly simple and practical and, at the same time, profound and powerful. As I took in the content, I first thought about myself and my relationships, especially my relationship with my wife and kids. Then I thought about everyone I knew and worked with. I have worked with people one on one and in small groups for the past 18 years, and I kept thinking, "Everyone needs this book!" The principles in this book hit right at the heart of relationships. The Lundbergs insightfully reveal that all of us need to know that we are of worth, that we matter to those around us. We all want to be valued and listened to. However most people don't feel listened to. Most of us don't listen well to others, even the people we love the most. Instead of listening most of us tend to think about our own situation or problems, or we begin to formulate well meaning "advice" we can give to "fix" that person. In so doing we inevitably invalidate that person and begin a process of negative relating for everyone involved. In contrast, the Lundbergs present 6 very simple, practical principles that, when applied, will empower the people and relationships we care about. In a nutshell they practically demonstrate that when we listen - when we truely listen to those we care about, without becoming defensive or thinking about how to "fix" them, we in essence validate them. When people feel validated they are empowered to solve their own struggles and problems with you walking beside them. My wife had told me for years that I did not "validate" her experience, her emotions, her opinions. After reading this book I finally knew what she meant. I meant well by trying to encourage and give advice, but I had never truely listened to her. Once I began applying the principles in this book I felt freed up from always trying to "fix" her and she felt empowered and respected more fully by me. In the work that I do I have literally read 100's of books in the past 18 years - most of them dealing with relationships and leadership. This is the best book I have read on either topic! Get this book, read it, apply it, and share it with others! Dan Christensen
Rating: 5
Summary: Validating Prinicples - Changed My Life w/ Family & Business
Comment: This book is written in plain,easy-to-understand language. My daughter was diagnosed with an eating disorder. Parents find it difficult in coping with an eating disorder and this book has helped so many. Professionals and Famiy Members absolutely can benefit and live by the Validation Principles and Questions. I can now listen and understand another person's point of view without having to change it. I have ordered at least six books for close friends. My own therapist has enjoyed the book and is now teaching the Validation Priniciples to parents with teenagers. I am now using the techniques in teaching management in my real estate business.
Rating: 5
Summary: Changed my life
Comment: This book is great.
Easy to read, practical, with very concrete advice that WORKS immediately!
You can start applying the suggestions right away and reap the benefits.
It worked with my 3 year old son and my 60 year old father. It's going to really enhance the relationship I have with my son.
No kidding! Depending on your personality type, if you are experiencing some stress & communication problems in your relationships, buy this book right away. It could do miracles for you too.
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Title: Married: For Better, Not Worse : The Fourteen Secrets to a Happy Marriage by Gary Lundburg, Joy Lundburg ISBN: 0142000876 Publisher: Penguin Books Pub. Date: 28 May, 2002 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves by C. Terry Warner ISBN: 1573459194 Publisher: Shadow Mountain Pub. Date: 01 August, 2001 List Price(USD): $19.95 |
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Title: Raising Children You Can Live With: A Guide for Frustrated Parents by Jamie B. Raser, Jamie Raser ISBN: 1886298114 Publisher: Bayou Publishing Pub. Date: 01 April, 1999 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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Title: Discovering Your Natural Talents; How to Love What You Do and Do What You Love by John Bradley ISBN: 0891093958 Publisher: Navpress Publishing Group Pub. Date: 01 January, 1994 List Price(USD): $12.00 |
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Title: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families: Building a Beautiful Family Culture in a Turbulent World by Stephen R. Covey ISBN: 0307440850 Publisher: Golden Books Pub. Date: 01 October, 1998 List Price(USD): $15.00 |
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