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Title: That's Not What I Meant! by Deborah Tannen ISBN: 0-345-34090-6 Publisher: Ballantine Books Pub. Date: 12 March, 1987 Format: Mass Market Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $6.99 |
Average Customer Rating: 3.09 (11 reviews)
Rating: 4
Summary: How to listen
Comment: This is my favorite of Tannen's books. It makes some simple but important points about why people have trouble communicating. They talk differently.
My favorite comment was about people having different tolerances for pauses after the other person stops talking. For some people it is 10 seconds. For others it was nano-seconds. I wanted to encourage a quiet friend to talk. I found that by counting silently to ten after I finished talking before starting again, made him realize there was a gap to be filled there. An easy trick but I learned a lot from him and Tannen.
This is the book to give to friends and relatives, rather than her others that beat the differences between men and women into the ground. Simple but with a sweet and useful message.
Rating: 2
Summary: A blueberry muffin with all the blueberrys and no muffin
Comment: The basic information in this book is invaluable, but the Author's style resembles that of high school student. The book is written in a classic outline style (I'm going to talk about this now), it's impersonal and has cold examples. Dr. Tannen doesn't seem to give much if any of her own realizations, instead she consistantly refers to other experts. I constantly felt as though I was reading a report written for a social psychology class.
Rating: 1
Summary: Tannen proving her point my missing the point
Comment: Tannen believes that men comunicate only in a report fassion. 'Only the facts, mame.' Women normally converse in a raport fassion, talking to build relationships. Tannen (a woman) doesn't understand that men build raport by talking the facts. How to overhaul an engine, sports stats, politics, etc. The condenced book form of this book would be a best seller and would go like this, "Men and women misunderstand each other all the time. It is worth the work and time to admit this and ask for clarification."
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Title: You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation by Deborah Tannen ISBN: 0060959622 Publisher: Quill Pub. Date: 24 July, 2001 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: I Only Say This Because I Love You : Talking to Your Parents, Partner, Sibs, and Kids When You're All Adults by Deborah Tannen ISBN: 0345407520 Publisher: Ballantine Books Pub. Date: 28 May, 2002 List Price(USD): $15.95 |
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Title: Talking from 9 to 5 : Women and Men at Work by Deborah Tannen ISBN: 0380717832 Publisher: Quill Pub. Date: 01 September, 1995 List Price(USD): $13.00 |
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Title: The Argument Culture : Moving from Debate to Dialogue by DEBORAH TANNEN ISBN: 0345407512 Publisher: Ballantine Books Pub. Date: 09 February, 1999 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: Gender and Discourse by Deborah Tannen ISBN: 0195101243 Publisher: Oxford Press Pub. Date: January, 1996 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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