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Title: The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan, Anna Quindlen ISBN: 0-393-32257-2 Publisher: W.W. Norton & Company Pub. Date: September, 2001 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
Average Customer Rating: 3.59 (32 reviews)
Rating: 4
Summary: A classic book and a triumph for Feminism - a must-read!
Comment: This is a well-documented and well-reseached book that discusses the problems faced by many American housewives. It was written in the sixties, when women were returning to their homes after the sexual revolution and the woman's right movement, when they were proudly filling in forms with "Occupation: Housewife" once again. These women were told by psychoanalysists, who mostly based their findings on Frued's theories, that a woman's sex life and happiness was ultimately found through living her life soley for her husband and children. The women Freidan studied and interviewed for this book were usually surburban wives, living in nice houses with their executive husbands who made a lot of money. These women had done everything right. They had married young: some barely finished or didn't finish high school, others dropped out of college, all for the goal of marrying their sweetheart and fulfilling the perfect image of the feminime mystique. These women had had many babies by natural childbirth, they sewed all their clothes and washed all their dished by hand, they had breastfed them all, they had doted on their childrens' and husband's interests and goals so much that they lost sight of their own. And even though these women were living by the perfect standards set by the "feminine mystique", they were dreadfully unhappy. So many were seeing pscyhoanalysts without positive results, so many were harboring resentful, depressing thoughts, and contemplating everything from an extramarital affair to suicide. And the most common problem of all came to be known as "chronic fatique syndrome". The women with this problem experienced listlessness and wrestlessness. They were always tired no matter how much they slept. Their joints and bones ached. They could not stayed interested in or concentrated on one subject for a long period of time. They were physically with their children all the time, but never really there in spirit.
And so, based on these findings, Freidan studied these women more, interviewed them more, and wrote The Feminine Mystique, in which she published her theories. I found most of her ideas to be extremely well thought out, and I can imagine how much the american housewife of the sixties, and later, really needed these ideas. For instance, Friedan comments on how "housework expands to fit the time available", noting that the house of the working women was always clean, even though she had a limited amount of time to clean it in, while the housewife who was perpetually cleaning and recleaning everything could never seem to "get anything done". Friedan also studied the ways in which these mothers affected their children, and most grew up to be dependant and irresponsible. The men looked for girls to marry who would take the place of their mother, who did everything for them, and the girls grew up to be stuck in the same trap as their mother, being a mother not only to their children but to their husbands as well, since their husbands had grown up under the feminine mystique and expected his wife to act as his mother had. Many times, the mothers try to live the dreams they never got fulfilled because of early marriage and motherhood through their children, and this is never good.
The most important thesis in this book, in my opinion, is the way in which Friedan pleads for women to become their own individuals. When a girl marries at seventeen, before she has even grown up herself, and has children of her own, her growing and learning process is stunted and she never finds out who she really is or what she really wants. When a woman waits on her family night and day, she loses such a big part of herself that she begins to feel like all she does for everyone else is useless and taken for granted. Freidan implores women to follow their own interests and not let the feminine mystique stunt their growth. She gives findings of women who finally went back to the desires and goals they had in their youth, as well as women who never left them but were the rare minority who combined motherhood with a career, and showed that they were no less women then the ones who stayed at home. In fact, having a life of their own improved the woman's marriage, family and sex life drastically when compared with the women whose worlds revolved around other people.
I found a few problems with Friedan's book and although they are insignificant in comparison with the book's positive aspects, they are worth pointing out nonetheless. Mainly, although Friedan is very advanced for her time in suggesting freedom and independence for women, she was very descriminative against homosexuals. She spent the first half of her book refuting Freud's theories about women and stating how he was a bad pscyhologist with unexamined and biased theories when it came to this area. However, she backs up her thesis about "weak" homosexual men being drawn to the love of other men because of the relationship they still desire with their mothers with all of Freud's theories. I don't think she should tear Freud's theories apart when it is in her favor and use the same person to back her up when she is talking about a different subject. Also her book is still sexist in the sense that she always expects women to do the housework and, if they choose to have a career, manage it along with the housework, when what she should do is suggest that if the man and the woman are both working, the man and the woman should both help out with the housework. However, since her views were so revolutionary at this time I am sure she did not want to press it by suggesting men actually do "woman's" work, since her very suggestion that women can and should do "man's" work was already taking things far.
On the whole this book was unquestionably fantastic. Although, fortunately, many women work today, some still face bias, prejudice, and descrimination from others, and this book goes to show that there is nothing wrong with a woman doing what she wants to do with her life just as there is nothing wrong with a man doing the same thing. And there are still some housewifes caught up in the feminine mystique who should read the book and find out why they are suffering the "problem who has no name". I feel that this book has done a tremendous amount of good for women throughout history after its publication, and it can still do a lot for them today...
Rating: 5
Summary: It made me think.
Comment: This was one of the most inspirational books I have ever read. Although the book discusses the condition of the lives of women during the 40's, 50's, and 60's it makes a person examine the way they are living their life right now. It helps a person understand why they might be unhappy and explains the steps that can be taken to find happiness. This is no longer just a book for femininsts; it is now a book for both men and women and can help a person live a more full and honest life.
Rating: 2
Summary: ONE SIDED
Comment: This book drags on and on until your just to the point will it ever end. One page she is talking about the housewife as having to much time on her hands and the other page she is so exausted at the end of the day because of all the work she does.It seems to mainly be directed to the rich or middle class stay at home mom if you donot fit that category then don't bother to read the book. Betty would like for us all to believe that the "american housewife" is or was every woman in america, and that simply is not so I know numerous women who only dream of staying at home for their husband and children not because they want the "good life" but because they want to be there for them. No matter how femininst put it being a wife and a mother is the first responsiblity of a woman career will always be second, if you don't believe that just look at all of the children now who stay in trouble or grow to live in trouble what is the one thing they blame it on, their childhood the way they were raised they say their moms or dads were never there for them. Mrs. Friedman puts women out that stay home with their families as the ignorant woman while the woman that chased her dream and forsake her family as the hero...hmm and we wonder what's wrong with America well read this book and you will see.
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Title: The Second Sex by Simone De Beauvoir ISBN: 0679724516 Publisher: Vintage Pub. Date: 17 December, 1989 List Price(USD): $17.00 |
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Title: The Beauty Myth : How Images of Beauty Are Used Against Women by Naomi Wolf ISBN: 0060512180 Publisher: Perennial Pub. Date: 24 September, 2002 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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Title: Backlash : The Undeclared War Against American Women by Susan Faludi ISBN: 0385425074 Publisher: Anchor Pub. Date: 06 September, 1992 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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Title: A Vindication of the Rights of Woman by Mary Wollstonecraft ISBN: 0486290360 Publisher: Dover Pubns Pub. Date: 03 July, 1996 List Price(USD): $3.00 |
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Title: My Soul Is Rested: Movement Days in the Deep South Remembered by Howell Raines ISBN: 0140067531 Publisher: Viking Press Pub. Date: September, 1983 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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