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Title: Life Strategies for Teens by Jay McGraw ISBN: 0-7432-1546-X Publisher: Fireside Pub. Date: 04 December, 2000 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.12 (33 reviews)
Rating: 5
Summary: A genuine key to success for teens!
Comment: I snagged an advance copy of this book and my husband and I , parents of three teenage sons, read it without ever putting it down. Wow! My husband questioned whether a man of 20 tender years could take on such an important and difficult topic.We say the answer is a resounding "yes"! Not only are the 10 life strategies scientifically well grounded, young Jay McGraw was raised by these laws, while struggling with all the typical issues faced by teens. Who better to write this book.
Jay writes with amazing clarity and uses examples with which everyone will identify. The real surprise about this book is that its message applies to every life situation, whether problem solving or achieving goals. Also, it would be a mistake for parents to assume that it is only a "kid" book. Parents must read it to better understand their own teen, and who knows, they may learn application of the 10 life laws for themselves.
Great Job, Jay McGraw. Thank you for a contribution to teens and parents alike that is beyond measure.
Rating: 5
Summary: A Helpful Translation of Teen Perspectives for Parents
Comment: "Dad, trust me, when it comes to teens, you don't get it!" Thus, Mr. Jay McGraw told his Dad, Dr. Phil McGraw, that Dr. Phil was violating his own first rule for Life Strategies, You Either Get It or You Don't. Mr. Jay had wanted to use Life Strategies to improve his own life, and found that it took him 6 years (from age 13 to age 19) to translate the lessons into a teen perspective that made sense to Mr. Jay. Mr. Jay was naturally appalled when he found that Dr. Phil had a book contract to do a book on Life Strategies for teens. The project was reborn in Mr. Jay's hands.
By the time Mr. Jay was done, he was no longer a teen, having reached the ripe old age of 20. But his memory of teenage perspectives is strong and salty.
Early in the book, he candidly points out that the teen did not buy this book. It was a gift from an adult, usually a parent. And that's a very good point -- one that I would like to comment on.
I suggest that you read this book before giving it to anyone. That may be its greatest benefit. Mr. Jay does a good job of taking on the key psychological, social, and developmental challenges of the teenage years. As you visit these points of view, you can begin to see how your teenager might see you.
For example, do you ever tell you teen stories about what it was like when you were your teen's age? I know I do. Mr. Jay points out that any self-respecting teen "knows" that those old lessons don't apply now. Times are much different and tougher now. Dad or Mom is just being "boring" again.
Do you ever interrupt your teen? Mr. Jay indicates that that means "that Mom or Dad doesn't ever listen to me." That can cut off the possibility of communication.
There's also a wonderful section on the roles that teenager's today choose to play (their social masks). All of a sudden it clicked. I saw each of our teenager's friends fitting neatly into one of these categories. I could suddenly predict how each would respond in any given situation. Wow! What a gift! Thank you, Mr. Jay!! What has happened is that a few new categories have been established since the Middle Ages when I was a teenager. I am very glad to get up-to-date.
The book itself follows Dr. Phil's 10 laws. You can read my reviews of Life Strategies and the Life Strategies Workbook if you want to know more about them.
Mr. Jay takes the perspective of what the payoff is from the teenage years. For example, he candidly points out that you can decide not to get good grades. But you have to understand that that means that you will get less respect from everyone, and have fewer choices after high school is over. Coming from a parent, that would have sounded preachy. Coming from Mr. Jay, it just sounds matter-of-fact.
Many teenagers are into not reading anything they don't have to, so I don't know how many will read this book. From a psychological point of view, it probably should have been positioned as something like "Have Great Teen Years Without Being Hassled by Your Parents and Friends." The book needs more rebellion against the convention wisdom to be appealing.
Regardless, it is great for us parents. Enjoy the examples, learn the role-playing, appreciate the angst, and avoid acting "boring." And by the time your teen is 24, you'll start to look pretty good in her or his eyes again. Be patient in the meantime.
If you have a pretty good relationship with your teen, a possible approach is to start doing Life Strategies yourself. Ask your teen if he or she would help you with the exercises in that book. As you open up about your issues, hopes, and dreams, you may stimulate an interest in your teen. In the meantime, be sure you have a copy of this book around the house, and be perfectly open about reading it. Who knows what might develop next? You could possibly start a dialogue by asking your teen to tell you what the three things are that you do that most annoy your teen. Then, see if you can do better.
Communication is the most important bridge to your teenager's development. Keep building that bridge daily, in ways that your teenager likes!
Rating: 5
Summary: Changed My Mindset & Thinking Habits
Comment: This book was quite excellent. As a thirteen-year-old girl, it sure got me in gear! My twelfth year was spent trying to fit in with the crowd, dismiss good grades, and wear tight clothing. Now, thanks to this book, I have newfound self-esteem, willpower, and goals which I am reaching one by one! My aunt, a huge fan of Dr. Phil, gave it to me for Christmas. I am already a different person. It helps so much with self-esteem issues, peer pressures, goal-setting and other teen dilemmas and issues.
I definitely recommend it to all teenagers who want to get their life in gear! It helps so much, but only if you allow it. This is not the kind of book that you can just skim through. You've got to read it and take action, take it to heart, in order for those Life Strategies to work in your life. I'm telling you, it's so helpful! Thanks Jay!
One last thing, however, I would like to direct to those who thought Jay McGraw was copycatting Dr. Phil's book- NO KIDDING! Where've you been? This book is the same as LIFE STRATEGIES, but it's just been rewritten for teenage understanding. And, also, the rich have their problems, too. Maybe Jay hasn't had to work hard for his popularity or money, but I'm sure it's obviously something he knows a lot about- THINK ABOUT IT! He has DR. PHIL for a father. Please try not to be so critical. Not everyone's perfect, and perfection is only in the eye of the beholder- there is no real perfection. No reality, just perception!
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Title: Closing the Gap : A Strategy For Bringing Parents And Teens Together by Jay McGraw ISBN: 0743224698 Publisher: Fireside Pub. Date: 13 November, 2001 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: Daily Life Strategies for Teens: Daily Calendar by Jay McGraw ISBN: 074322471X Publisher: Fireside Pub. Date: 23 October, 2001 List Price(USD): $11.00 |
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Title: The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey ISBN: 0684856093 Publisher: Simon & Schuster Pub. Date: 09 October, 1998 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: Ultimate Weight Solution for Teens: The 7 Keys to Weight Freedom by Jay McGraw ISBN: 0743257472 Publisher: Free Press Pub. Date: 25 November, 2003 List Price(USD): $15.95 |
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Title: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens Workbook (The 7 Habits) by Sean Covey ISBN: 1929494173 Publisher: Franklin Covey Company Pub. Date: December, 1999 List Price(USD): $5.00 |
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