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Title: Girl in the Mirror: Mothers and Daughters in the Years of Adolescence by Nancy L. Snyderman, Peg Streep ISBN: 0-7868-6743-4 Publisher: Hyperion Press Pub. Date: 06 February, 2002 Format: Hardcover Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $24.95 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.86 (7 reviews)
Rating: 5
Summary: Solid Research Backs Practical Advice
Comment: I was tempted to disregard the authors when they admitted they had not survived the tempests of the adolescent girl and were opining that "[w]e see the challenges of adolescence as an opportunity." Right, I thought. Wait until your daughter gets to be my kid's age and see if you'll keep saying it's just a great opportunity.
So with this bad attitude, I perservered. And after reading the book, I grudgingly agreed they had a point: you don't have to approach this phase as something to "get through," but as a period of self-reflection and growth for the mother as well as the daughter. They do a good job of explaining how to separate those issues and how what our mothers did influence us, whether by good example or bad. As the authors note, "[m]othering is not instinctual but an act of invention...[b]ecoming aware of who we are when we mother our adolexcent daughters is a step each of us must take, and will require that we look at how the ways we were mothered affect us now."
The research was very well explained--everything to why it seems that our daughters are stressed out over things that seem so trivial to us to the effects of lenghthened educational requirements. The authors deal specifically with issues that may cause special problems for teen girls: sexual identity, substance abuse, depression, bipolar disorder, eating disorders, and abusive relationships. It would have been nice if they had addressed self-injury more, as it has become more epidemic among teenage girls, and only receives a one-sentence mention.
Overall, however, this is an excellent overview of the issues facing mothers of adolescent daughters, and deserves to be both read and reread.
Rating: 5
Summary: extraordinary book
Comment: This is an extraordinary book filled with support, encouragment,and insight for the mother of an adolescent girl. "Girl in the Mirror" picks up where "Embracing Persephone" by Rutter leaves off. As a psychologist specializing in adolescent girls, and mother of a 15 year daughter, I found the book invaluable and will read it over and over again for guidance. There is so much personal pain for mothers to let go of their daughters and move on with their lives. I have been searching for a book that would comfort and guide ME during my perimenapause in relation to the deep pain of some of the emotional letting go that must take place between mother and daughter during the teen years. These authors call it liberation not separation, they show through empirical and anecdotal information how mothers don't need to pull away, they need to be there and let their daughters pull away and come back when they need to. "Girl in the Mirror" steps out of the sterotypical advise about adolescent angst and moves the reader through some of the internal angst a mother feels letting her daughter become liberated. The research is in depth, and the anecdotal examples are rich with variety. Addressing mid life and adolescence is key for mothers to understand themselves, and appreciate they still have a strong solid place in their daughters lives. Snyderman and Streep honor the special bond between mothers and daughters. All mothers will benifit from this book. The pain of separation is the same, whether you have a son or daughter. Mother's need guidance and support to stay in the lives of their adolescent children, even when they tell us to go away. Snyderman and Streep put it this way: "Shepherding our daughters through adolescence requires that we give them love, support, safe haven, and when the time is right, permission to leave us behind; it also requires that we give ourselves permission, in turn, to move on to another stage of life." They let us reach this challenge as a journey and help us see it does not happen over night, they shephard the reader through this challenging journey and help us find the jewels amoung some of the pain, leaving us with hope. I highly reccomend this book to all mothers of all adolescents.
Rating: 5
Summary: An excellent read !!
Comment: This book is surely worth buying !I was extremely impressed by the contents of the book.Iwill surely refer to this book a lot when my daughter who is only 8 now gets older.I am tempted to call this book a "bible" for women with daughters !
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Title: Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence by Rosalind Wiseman ISBN: 1400047927 Publisher: Three Rivers Press Pub. Date: 04 March, 2003 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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Title: Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls by Rachel Simmons ISBN: 0156027348 Publisher: Harvest Books Pub. Date: 01 April, 2003 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: GirlWise: How to Be Confident, Capable, Cool, and in Control by JULIA DEVILLERS ISBN: 0761563636 Publisher: Three Rivers Press Pub. Date: 27 August, 2002 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
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Title: I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict by Roni Cohen, Phd Sandler, Michelle Sliver, Roni Cohen-Sandler, Michelle Silver ISBN: 0140286004 Publisher: Penguin USA (Paper) Pub. Date: 28 February, 2000 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
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Title: Ophelia Speaks : Adolescent Girls Write About Their Search for Self by Sara Shandler ISBN: 0060952970 Publisher: Perennial Pub. Date: 01 June, 1999 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
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